Gillian has a bad habit of rubbing/kicking the back of my seat in the car with her feet. I asked her to quit kicking my seat with her shoes, the response, "Actually they are boots and actually it's Daddy's seat." So it was my car but Craig was driving....I thanked her for correcting me and she stopped.
We bought special nail polish that is a dark pink but sparkly so I wouldn't be doing purple all the time. I went and got a pedicure and had light pink put on my toes...and I don't have any nail polish on my finger nails. Tonight I had to redo Gillian's toe nails light pink and she doesn't have nail polish on her finger nails. I love that she likes being like me:) I know it won't be like this forever!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Monday, March 29, 2010
Weekend Recap
It is funny but I look so forward to the weekends and then I blink and it is over. I need to start looking forward to evenings but those seem even shorter then weekends or may I need to retire young then I would look forward to everyday....Craig that last part is mainly relying on you....lol.
I bought some pink sparkly nail polish which got Gillian's approval thinking we could switch from the purple to the pink and kind of go back and forth between the two but no....her nails were repainted purple on Friday night. I didn't really think she would give in and switch for a week but I had hoped maybe...
Saturday we took Gillian to dance which was the normal, we now have her trained that there can be no crying because she needs to get in and get the purple carpet to sit on....lol. So it is now a mad dash to be early so she can get the purple carpet. It was costume week where she got one of her two costumes that she will be wearing in the recital in June. We got some bad news too that there will be limited seats and tickets so not everyone can come:( I'm sure it will be on video for future viewing pleasures. I know it's not the same but it will work.
Saturday afternoon we had Emma's birthday party. It was at Play Place which I was excited to see how it works because Craig and I have been thinking about having Gillian's 5th birthday party there and inviting her friends from daycare. After seeing how it works, we will not be having her 5th party there. This town really needs a place to host kids parties because there really isn't anything. I think I found a business calling my name...maybe job change instead of retirement is in my future. Either way, Gillian had a good time and Emma enjoyed it so that is all that really matters to me.
Grammie and Grampie Miner had called and asked if they could take Gillian for the remainder of the day and the night so I dropped Gillian off. After chatting with Janet for about an hour, I was told to leave by my daughter. Obviously I was cramping her style.
So what to do all by myself (Craig was working). I went to PetSmart and looked at cats. You may be thinking,"But Barb, you have never had a cat" or "Your dog may eat a cat." Both are normal thoughts. I'm hesitant to get a cat because I have never owned one but they seem like a dog but less needy. Pooh is pretty low maintenance. Feed her once a day and give her a rub down and she pretty much leaves you alone until the next day. I have observed cats doing pretty much that. Although Pooh appears very tough (great guard dog), whenever a cat comes in our yard, she charges at it, it hits or swats and she lays down. Yup, great guard dog....
You are probably wondering what brought on this cat interest. Gillian asked for a cat a while ago and we considered and refused. Gillian asked me for a hamster on Saturday, it went like this - "Mom, I want a hamster. A real, live one." I not knowing what to say....told her to ask her Dad. I don't want hamsters (fury mice), mice (hairless hamsters), guinea pigs (hippie hamster) or fish (cleaning the tank is a pain and really they are fun to watch for 2 seconds) or birds (I would never clean that cage or let it out of it's cage). So this lead me to the cat. I could handle the litter box...automatic litter cleaner, here we come. I figure, Gillian will be entertained by it and go back to her own thing, the cat will investigate Gillian and go back to it's own thing. PERFECT relationship, right?
I mentioned my adventure to Craig on Sunday and he appeared less than impressed about my looking. We'll see....I send baby brown eyes in and we probably would end up with two...lol...just kidding honey:)
Sunday was calm and relaxing. I laid on the couch most of the day reading. I think that reading is helping me as much as therapy. It's like my me time....even if others are around and I'm ready, they don't know what I'm reading and if they start talking to me without saying my name, I might be so into my book that I don't even pay attention. I get so into the stories that it is like a good show that you can't turn off until it is done. I'm averaging a 400 page book a week. Which is probably nothing special but when I wasn't reading a page a week back in early December I think that's pretty good.
I picked up Gillian from her grandparents and she didn't want to come with me (not a shocker). We talked all the way home so I'm not sure how it happened but from turning into our development to our driveway she fell asleep to the point that I moved her and she didn't budge. She slept for 2 hours. I let her although I probably should have woken her but she still made it to be on time and fell asleep so obviously she needed the sleep. She had her bath, a pear, shows and her goodnight stories...and a surprise voice mail from Dad that I saved for her right before bed so she could hear his voice...
I bought some pink sparkly nail polish which got Gillian's approval thinking we could switch from the purple to the pink and kind of go back and forth between the two but no....her nails were repainted purple on Friday night. I didn't really think she would give in and switch for a week but I had hoped maybe...
Saturday we took Gillian to dance which was the normal, we now have her trained that there can be no crying because she needs to get in and get the purple carpet to sit on....lol. So it is now a mad dash to be early so she can get the purple carpet. It was costume week where she got one of her two costumes that she will be wearing in the recital in June. We got some bad news too that there will be limited seats and tickets so not everyone can come:( I'm sure it will be on video for future viewing pleasures. I know it's not the same but it will work.
Saturday afternoon we had Emma's birthday party. It was at Play Place which I was excited to see how it works because Craig and I have been thinking about having Gillian's 5th birthday party there and inviting her friends from daycare. After seeing how it works, we will not be having her 5th party there. This town really needs a place to host kids parties because there really isn't anything. I think I found a business calling my name...maybe job change instead of retirement is in my future. Either way, Gillian had a good time and Emma enjoyed it so that is all that really matters to me.
Grammie and Grampie Miner had called and asked if they could take Gillian for the remainder of the day and the night so I dropped Gillian off. After chatting with Janet for about an hour, I was told to leave by my daughter. Obviously I was cramping her style.
So what to do all by myself (Craig was working). I went to PetSmart and looked at cats. You may be thinking,"But Barb, you have never had a cat" or "Your dog may eat a cat." Both are normal thoughts. I'm hesitant to get a cat because I have never owned one but they seem like a dog but less needy. Pooh is pretty low maintenance. Feed her once a day and give her a rub down and she pretty much leaves you alone until the next day. I have observed cats doing pretty much that. Although Pooh appears very tough (great guard dog), whenever a cat comes in our yard, she charges at it, it hits or swats and she lays down. Yup, great guard dog....
You are probably wondering what brought on this cat interest. Gillian asked for a cat a while ago and we considered and refused. Gillian asked me for a hamster on Saturday, it went like this - "Mom, I want a hamster. A real, live one." I not knowing what to say....told her to ask her Dad. I don't want hamsters (fury mice), mice (hairless hamsters), guinea pigs (hippie hamster) or fish (cleaning the tank is a pain and really they are fun to watch for 2 seconds) or birds (I would never clean that cage or let it out of it's cage). So this lead me to the cat. I could handle the litter box...automatic litter cleaner, here we come. I figure, Gillian will be entertained by it and go back to her own thing, the cat will investigate Gillian and go back to it's own thing. PERFECT relationship, right?
I mentioned my adventure to Craig on Sunday and he appeared less than impressed about my looking. We'll see....I send baby brown eyes in and we probably would end up with two...lol...just kidding honey:)
Sunday was calm and relaxing. I laid on the couch most of the day reading. I think that reading is helping me as much as therapy. It's like my me time....even if others are around and I'm ready, they don't know what I'm reading and if they start talking to me without saying my name, I might be so into my book that I don't even pay attention. I get so into the stories that it is like a good show that you can't turn off until it is done. I'm averaging a 400 page book a week. Which is probably nothing special but when I wasn't reading a page a week back in early December I think that's pretty good.
I picked up Gillian from her grandparents and she didn't want to come with me (not a shocker). We talked all the way home so I'm not sure how it happened but from turning into our development to our driveway she fell asleep to the point that I moved her and she didn't budge. She slept for 2 hours. I let her although I probably should have woken her but she still made it to be on time and fell asleep so obviously she needed the sleep. She had her bath, a pear, shows and her goodnight stories...and a surprise voice mail from Dad that I saved for her right before bed so she could hear his voice...
Friday, March 26, 2010
The last 4 years...
The last 4 years of my life have been the hardest years of my life. It has taken me 4 years to admit that. I had to realize that I can't do it all, realize that I was scared and realize that I have to let others in...
Talking to my friend was the best decision. I feel so much better. The pain I have been feeling is now healing.
This is the first birthday of Gillian's that I haven't cried or felt any anxiety. I enjoyed her birthday and the week leading up to her birthday. Instead of dwelling on what has happened, I looked at my little girl and took in every minute. I had fun and I feel like the people around me had fun.
Normally I spend January through April in a rut of reliving the end of my pregnancy and the first 33 days of Gillian's life. Even though I wanted to move on, I couldn't because it was a life changing and threatening event. It isn't a situation that anyone moves on from, you learn to live with it and continue life. I've learned a lot about myself and the people around me by going to see my friend. I truly wish that I had done it sooner.
Talking to my friend was the best decision. I feel so much better. The pain I have been feeling is now healing.
This is the first birthday of Gillian's that I haven't cried or felt any anxiety. I enjoyed her birthday and the week leading up to her birthday. Instead of dwelling on what has happened, I looked at my little girl and took in every minute. I had fun and I feel like the people around me had fun.
Normally I spend January through April in a rut of reliving the end of my pregnancy and the first 33 days of Gillian's life. Even though I wanted to move on, I couldn't because it was a life changing and threatening event. It isn't a situation that anyone moves on from, you learn to live with it and continue life. I've learned a lot about myself and the people around me by going to see my friend. I truly wish that I had done it sooner.
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