Hope is lost....

I had my appointment today and it didn't go quite how I thought. I have been feeling good and my bp has been pretty consistent. The doctor had said at the last appointment that if both those things happened that I could possibly go back to work. I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up.

I was obviously upset when the doctor told me that I wouldn't be going to work until after the baby was born. I'm home alone all the time. It's lonely. I had even bought some maternity clothes because I really thought I was going back. It did throw me into reality when the doctor asked if my coworkers would be able to help me if I had a heart attack or stroke on the sales floor. Being a person that doesn't like to draw attention the idea of that happening is mortifying. So back to my big empty house...

Lonely

Craig left today:( I know it's for the best but now it's just me, the bun in the oven and Pooh in this big house. It is the most lonely I have ever been....

Hope

I had an appointment today. It went good. The doctor seemed happy with how the medication is working. He did warn me that I'm high risk for a preemie. He didn't elaborate on it just told me that I was high risk. He also said that at my next appointment if my bp is consistent and I'm feeling good it may be possible to go back to work.

It is sad that I'm so bored at home that I want to go back to work. I'm home alone all day long. I have watched everything possible on TV and started watching entire television shows on dvd. I have read all the books that have been sitting around for the past year. I have nothing to do so this sitting home relaxing thing isn't very relaxing.